Saturday, June 12, 2010

The 16 Presidents of the Philippines --a historical satire






Satirical text version:


1ANDRES C. BONIFACIO (1896-1897) *
TUNAY na Unang Pangulo. Ayaw kilalanin ng mga elitista.

2.  EMILIO F. AGUINALDO (1897/98-1901)  
Orihinal na mang-aagaw. Berdugo 2x. Nagpa-onse sa mga Amerikano.

3.  MANUEL LUIS M. QUEZON (1935-1944)
Panahon ng Imperyalistang Kano. Pinataob si 'hero-killer' Aguinaldo sa Halalan 1935.

4. JOSE P. LAUREL (1943-1945)
Panahon ng 'Takot ako Hapon.'

5. SERGIO S. OSMENA (1944/45 - 1946)
 Hindi suportado ng Amerika ang pagtakbo noong 1946. Hindi nagkampanya kaya tumiklop kay Roxas.

6. MANUEL A. ROXAS (1946 - 1948)
Ginoong "Parity Rights." Aming likas na yaman ay inyo rin, Amerika!

7.  ELPIDIO R. QUIRINO (1948 - 1953)
Panahon ng Hukbalahap. Pinatalo daw ng Amerika noong Halalan ng 1953.

8.  RAMON F. MAGSAYSAY (1953 - 1957)
Care of the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA). Makataong "Amboy."

9.  CARLOS P. GARCIA (1957 - 1961)
  "Filipino First" policy. Period.

10. DIOSDADO P. MACAPAGAL (1961 - 1965)
Kalayaan daw ng bansa ay Hunyo 12, 1898.

11. FERDINAND E. MARCOS (1965 - 1986)
Diktator ng Martial Law. Pero medyo inayos ang bayan.

12. CORAZON COJUANGCO AQUINO (1986- 1992)
Santa de Santita. May "Kamag-Anak Inc."

13. FIDEL V. RAMOS - (1992 - 1998)
Nanalo DAW noong Halalan 1992. Salamat sa brownouts.

14. JOSEPH  EJERCITO ESTRADA (1998 - 2001)
Mabisyo. Pero may nasyonalismo, patriotismo, at populismo (maka-Masa). Biktima ng mga tampalasan at timang.

15. GLORIA MACAPAGAL ARROYO (2001-2010)
Mangaagaw # 2. "Pangulo" ni Hello Garci at Ampatuan. Ang Pinaka.....   grrrrrrrr! Matagal nang hinihintay ni FPJ.

16. BENIGNO SIMEON AQUINO (2010 - ___) 
Automated Hello Garci a.k.a. HOCUS PCOS # 1. (?).  Aba eh, anong nangyari kay dilawang Gob. Rafael Nantes ?!?



*Andres Bonifacio, Unang Pangulo ng 'Pilipinas' (Setting the Historiographic Record Straight)
http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2011/12/andres-bonifacio-unang-pangulo-ng.html
_________

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Ayon sa aking npag-aralan sa Jose P. Laurel na subject sa Lyceum of the Philippines University, nagging presidente si JPL para isalba si Quezon sa mga Hapon. Nung pinakilalang presidente si JPL lumipad patungong Amerika si Quezon at si JPL at ang kanyang pamilya ay tumakas nmn patungong Bagiuo sa at nanuluyan sa President’d Mansion. At pagkalipas ng ilang araw ay lumipad patungong Japan. (sa pagkakaalala ko sa leksyon)

Unknown said...

This was a good article. I've been a fan of the Philippines for a few years now and love learning about them. One of my favorite sites Paradise In Philippines - www.paradiseinphilippines.com offers a lot of good information, especially about Cebu City.

Jesusa Bernardo said...

Andres Bonifacio, Unang Pangulo ng 'Pilipinas' (Setting the Historiographic Record Straight)

http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2011/12/andres-bonifacio-unang-pangulo-ng.html

Jesusa Bernardo said...

All the completed Bonifacio Series set:

The HACKING of the SUPREMO, Unang Bahagi (Bonifacio Series VII). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2012/05/hacking-of-supremo-unang-bahagi.html

Andres Bonifacio, Unang Pangulo ng 'Pilipinas': Setting the Historiographic Record Straight (Bonifacio Series VI)

Mga Larawan at Sulatin ukol kay Supremo Andres Bonifacio (Bonifacio Series V). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2011/12/andres-bonifacio-unang-pangulo-ng.html

Tragedy of the Katipunan (Bonifacio Series IV). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2011/05/tragedy-of-katipunan-assassination-cum.html

The Devaluation of a Hero & Promotion of a Counter-Hero: Where's Andres Bonifacio in the 5 Peso Coin? Make it P2.00. (Bonifacio Series III). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2010/01/devaluation-of-hero-promotion-of.html

Andres Bonifacio's Tagalog Nation & Predictions of Global Warming (Bonifacio Series II). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2009/05/bonifacios-taga-ilog-nation-predictions.html

Gat Andres Bonifacio: The Anti-Colonial National Hero of the Philippines (Bonifacio Series I). http://forthephilippines.blogspot.com/2008/11/andres-anti-colonial-national-hero-of.html

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